Solitude?

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Sometimes you feel lonely when you are alone – other times you feel in touch with yourself.

During my growing up days (not that I make any claims that that phase is completely over :-) ) I used to spend a lot of times by myself – and I used to feel so good afterwards.

Today I am getting that feeling back again. Have you ever felt this feeling of being alone but not fully too? It’s nice I tell you – or maybe it’s just me.

So I woke up at 6 AM today (I have almost forgotten that there exists single-digit AMs nowadays – oh wait – there is 2 and 3 AM! Right! But anything after that – naaah!)

And I worked after that – believe me – I worked at 6 AM although there was no real urgency to that effect. But this somehow ruined my day I guess – I went late to work and the whole day just passed like that – meetings and discussions. I did manage to scrape in the bare minimum work anyway…

But the whole day I was feeling like I wanted to spend some time with myself – just doing nothing. Enough of doing something all the time.

So I went for a movie – I wanted to see these 4 or 5 movies since 2 weeks – and I finally made 1 today. Definitely, Maybe. Turned out I liked it a lot – reminds me of my life in some ways – anyway it was a nice movie. Then I started having these solitude/melancholy feelings – yes these words generally are associated with a negative state of mind – but from my personal experience – it’s good for you – as long as it’s short time. Considering tomorrow morning I have to go play cricket at 8 AM and have lots of other plans for the day there’s not much scope of this mood getting extended.

Anyway – right now I am sitting in my balcony – with lights dimmed out – and Nirvana’s acoustic tracks playing in the background – looking at the streets 23 floors below me, the mild rain and the people – the lights from all these high-rises around me. Nice… Nirvana just does something to me…

Basically just enjoying the atmosphere – thinking things slowly in a relaxed manner (ok with a beer too – I love European beers by the way) – and that’s it.

Quite an abrupt ending – but I never much to say to start with :-)